Saturday, May 13, 2017

You've Taught Me

Dear Mothers and teachers of my life,

This is to you... mothers, grandmothers, great grandmothers, yet to be mothers, moms of many, with partners and without, you've all taught me.

To my friends that became mothers years before me, when I couldn't relate. When all I could say was 'wow, that's great' but not understanding the totality of your life change. I know I observed from afar, but I saw a change in you. I knew you had grown and were different, it was beautiful to witness. You taught me.

To all my previous step mothers, you taught me. I learned resilience, I learned from your mistakes, your attempt to bring us in, to love us as best you could. I learned some what to do's as well as some what not to do's but I know your role wasn't simple. You taught me.

To my sweet oldest friend with the brand new baby. You're wonderful, and so incredible. You've been teaching me for over 20 years.

To my previous mom-in-love, you've taught me. You've taught me joy, so much laughter, persistence, a love for heavenly Father, but most importantly to have a thick skin, and soft heart. I miss you terribly, you've taught me.

To my wonderful Gram that my heart is often achy for. I wish you could see these grandbabies, you would be beside yourself, they're so wonderful. You taught me to hear the music and sing along as often as possible. And to my Grandma, you've shown me what it looks like to be committed and serve. They way you have served your husband, my PopPop, long after he's left this earth by continuing to serve his shipmates and play the role of a service members wife. You've both taught me.

To my great Aunt Dorthy, I weap as I write to you, because I'm sad you're soon to leave this side of heaven, but you have taught me to invest time in my kids and one day their kids. To show up. You have taught me the beauty in putting others first and our Christmas Eve's will never be the same. In the words of Collins, "you get to see GOLD!!!!!" We'll take care of the dogs. You taught me.

To my dearest of friends, you have taught me what it means to love and support no. matter. what. You have shown me what it means to be a friend, and a wife, and a mother, and to fight for what I deserve. You teach me everyday.

To my Aunt and Cousin, you have taught me what it means to laugh despite it all and that family is the only constant. You have taught me what it looks like to be a strong woman. You've laughed with me through the hardest of times and invested your energy into me, walking through the difficulties of the last few years. I've watched you love and support your husbands and how you make each other better. You've taught me the best of the best nights are laughing together, drinking good drinks, and eating delicious food. You teach me constantly.

To my kids step mom, you have taught me how to allow them to be fully loved by another. You have stepped up in grace, taught me kindness and humility and respect. I'm thankful for you, you're teaching me.

To my incredible friend and her wife with a grown son, you teach me constantly in work, in life, and in relationships. You teach me to laugh- a lot. You've taught me so much about what it looks like to support your child as they've grown into an adult, and life lessons after some of your mistakes when he was young. You're an incredible mother, and a wonderful teacher.

To my sisters, you're lovely. You've taught me each in your own ways. We've all had our ups and downs and all rounds, but at the end of the days, we're family. You're teaching me all the time.

To my beautiful friend's that have struggled with fertility, YOU are the fiercest of them all. Trying again and again, broken heart after broken heart. Pursing so bravely after so much defeat. I celebrate you as a mother and the strongest of them all. As someone who didn't plan either of my perfectly healthy children, you've taught me an incredible amount.

To my sister-in-law, who never planned your life as it's panned out, we adore you. You are a beautiful, flawless, humble, strong, fighter and protector, and do it all with such ease. Your passion to serve, protect, and empower my nephew is magical. You've taught me.

To my single mom friends, those who feel they're really living large when at the end of the week there's still $135 in their account. Those who were able to buy a full load of groceries and new underwear for the kids. Who don't get to tap out. Who are losing their minds with the missing socks, spilled milk, and car a/c going out because all of that means money that you just don't have. Those who snapped at your kids one too many times and feel like you're failing. Those who have had the courage to ask and accept help because there's just no other way around it. I see you, I am you, and you teach me in your massive amount of strength and persistence that no one will understand unless they've done it.

To my mom, You've taught me in ways I can never count. You've taught me to FIGHT. To succeed. you've taught me to serve my family. You've taught me to be humble. You've shown me an amount of unconditional love that I can't comprehend. You've taught me how to love my children, that crying is ok...even at commercials, you've taught me to laugh hard enough to pull the car over, how to two step, cook-although I haven't been the best student. You've taught me to sacrifice and to survive after emotional abuse. You've taught me to find adventure in whatever I'm doing.

As a mom, mothers day brings copious amounts of emotions. I could never express all of my gratitude in full to all of my teachers but I wouldn't have been able to do this life without each of you. You're my teachers, the ones I'm able to link arms with, to laugh and cry with. I am your biggest cheerleader, Go Mom's Go!

Big Love,